Labor Tips for Birth Partner

Described below are the stages of a normal, progressing labor. Every mother’s experience is unique and different, because every child is different and unrrepeatabe! Typically labor takes longer for a first time mother and then if she has more children, labor seems to be shorter.

Pre-Labor:This is the stage that occurs at the very end of the third trimester. Pre-labor can start days or hours before active labor kicks in. It can start and stop as well. A woman will most likely still be able to do her daily functions and will be able to be distracted from the pre-labor contractions. This is when the cervix is moving forward, thinning out and softening so the baby can come through the birth canal. The contractions are non-progressing,meaning they do not get stronger, longer, or closer together. 

Early Labor :(0-3) You may or may not notice that you are in this stage of labor.
This stage typically lasts 2-24 hours. Contractions are starting to get longer, stronger and closer together and do not go away if you lay down. 

• Relaxing and distraction

“3-5”: This is what Penny Simkin calls the “moment of truth”, because this is when the mother realizes she cannot control labor. If she is able to “surrender” during this stage she is much more likely able to cope with the rest of labor. 
Things the woman may need:

• Help her to find a rhythm to work through each contraction (they may become more intense without much dilation happening at this point, but each one is still helping further labor along and soon she will dilate more quickly!). 
• Make her feel safe and supported, remind her that you are there for her and she can do this!
• Light touch massage
• Can try distract her in between contractions through watching a funny show, talking, playing a board game, going on a walk, praying, etc. But during the contraction give her your attention and show her your support. 
• Standing (with knees slightly bent, to relax pelvic area) and move hips in circles or side to side
• Roll on birth ball
• Rocking in a chair
• Slow dancing
• Leaning forward over something 
• Massage (hands, feet, head, neck, legs, back, hips, arms)

***When you get checked into the hospital and settled in your room, you can dim the lights (this helps relax the body), ask the nurses to talk quietly, advocate for her, and you can politely meet the staff at the door before entering the room to prevent the mother from losing focus. You also have the right to ask for a different nurse if needed. 

****It is not abnormal for labor to slow down once you get to the hospital, due to the bright lights, unfamiliar people, loud noises etc. 
 
*****Remind her to hydrate! Even if she doesn’t want much. 

****The key to labor is not just one position, but changing positions, using gravity and mobility to work with your body to birth baby

*****She will start needing all of her mental capacity to focus on labor, try to prevent any interruptions. Ask only yes or no questions, but never during a contraction.  Ask if something is working in between the contraction and she can tell you yes or no. 
Mom’s job is only to tell you what she needs, she may make noises, say things she may not normally, etc. but this is her way of coping. I suggest you come up with a “code word” for if she really wants pain relievers of any sort.

****BRAIN: Benefits, Risk, Alternatives, Intuition (Holy Spirit), Nothing. At any point in labor you can always ask the staff to have a minute to discuss and/or ask what the benefits, risks, and alternatives are in the situation. Listen to the Holy Spirit and ask what would happen if you did nothing.
 
Active Labor: (6cm-8/9cm) This is when dilation speeds up, which means intensity, frequency and duration of contractions also picks up! Contractions may last 60 seconds or more and come every 4 minutes or less apart. This stage normally lasts 30 minutes to 6 hours. 

• Hands and knees-really helps with back labor (can massage her back while she is in this position, roll tennis balls on her back, do the double hip squeeze, use the rebozo to sift from side-to-side).
• Sit backwards on a chair (also gives you access to her back)
• Sit on toilet forward or backwards, to relax pelvic area
• Massage
• Child’s pose
• Bath or shower if you are still at home 
• Help her to stay in the moment and not fear the next contraction
• Find a focal point
• Encouragement! 
• Breathing! If she loses track of breathing, breathe with her (e.g. as the contraction starts say Ok, (name) breathe with me, inhale 1,2,3,4 and exhale 5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,etc.)
• Vocal! You can also encourage her to use her voice (low tones) as she exhales, this really helps her “open”. 
• If you see her tensing her shoulders, jaw or clenching her fists, just gently remind her to relax those parts of her body (e.g. inhale and on the exhale say Ok relax your jaw). Tensing up makes the contractions more painful, as it blocks the endorphins which are natural pain relievers. 
• Kissing
• Ice chips
• The Dangle
• Relaxing music to keep the environment peaceful
• Pray! 
• Side lying release: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMqS50hgLhY 
• Counterpressure on low-back/sacrum area
• Acupressure (can help move labor along if it stalls) Press in between thumb and index finger or 4 fingers above her inner ankle. Pg. of the Birth Partner
• Can lay on back with tennis ball underneath
• She may get hot in this stage (or cold) so either offer her a cool towel (can ask nurse for a bucket of ice to dip wash clothes in) and or a blanket to stay warm.
• Hot or cold packs on area she feels pressure
• If she seems to be losing her rhythm try to look her in the eye and be firm and gentle reminding her that she is made to do this and you are with her. You could also go underneath a blanket to silence everything else around you out. 
• Essential oils (can put on cotton balls, let her sniff the bottle, or put on a washcloth) Lavender is good for relaxing, lemon or peppermint are good for energy or nausea, geranium helps balance hormones and has a nice flowery scent, gentle baby is good for relaxing and calm. 
• Capstick if she is getting dry lips
• Double Hip Squeeze
• Make sure your breath smells good too if possible!
• Encourage her that she can do anything for a minute

Transition: Dilates from 8/9-10cm. Contractions can last 1.5-2 minutes long and are closer together/little rest in between. This stage normally only lasts 5-30 minutes. At this stage the baby’s head moves within the uterus, through the cervix, and down into the vagina. She may start to shake or vomit, have cramps in her thighs or pressure in the pelvic area. Her skin may tingle and may not like being touched in this stage. She may feel the urge to push (if she is not yet fully dilated the caregiver will most likely tell her to do small breathes and bear down lightly. This will prevent her cervix from swelling and causing her labor to slow down) 

• Encouragement/ Tell her the finish line is near! Help her to focus just one contraction at a time and don’t worry about the clock. 
• Do any of the above options
• Hold the Crucifix or visualize Jesus on the Cross
• Visualize Jesus sending His love into your heart and baby
• When inhaling, invite her to breathe into baby giving him/her lots of oxygen and on the exhale to breathe the baby down. 
• Double Hip Squeeze
• God made you to be this child’s mother, you can do this!

***May or may not get a resting stage before an urge to push. Enjoy this stage and take advantage of it! It normally doesn’t last over 30 minutes. It is when the baby has descended the the uterus is shrinking back down around baby to be able to push them out.


Pushing! This stage typically lasts 30 minutes to 3 hours.  Will feel the urge to push, may feel like a big poop. To prevent tearing, pushing only when you have the urge/contraction is best. This is an involuntary action that your body knows what to do to get the baby out. Gradual pressure on the stretching of the vagina is better and will put less pressure on the baby’s head.  Will feel a lot of pressure, but less “pain” perse from the contractions. When the baby’s head “crown’s” it will sting the vaginal opening due to stretching. 

• Squatting
• Side lying with top leg pulled towards chest. 
• Hands and knees on bed, leaning over birth ball
• When the head crowns light blows and a lifted chin helps with contractions and from baby coming out too fast and tearing. 

Placental Stage: The placenta will separate from the uterine wall and come out of the vaginal opening. This will occur with a few contractions, sometimes the mother doesn’t notice while other times she will. They are not like active labor contractions though and she may be too focused on holding your baby to notice. It may feel like sharp cramping. Typically the placentl will be out in 15-30 minutes after birth. The caregiver will ensure the entire placenta is present to ensure nothing is left inside the uterus that could cause infections. The umbilical cord is cut at this stage too. The caregiver will often firmly massage the mother’s abdomen to ensure it is firming back up (she is often very uncomfortable) and will monitor her bleeding. 

• Hold her hand if she needs through the contractions as the placenta comes out. 
• Praise God and celebrate!
• Know it is ok if you don’t feel immediately overwhelmed with joy as sometimes it takes a little bit to get back with the reality of what you just accomplished! It is hard work and sometimes you just need to catch your breath for a minute. 
• Baby may do the “breast crawl”. Let him/her “root” around to find your nipple and start nursing as soon as the baby is showing signs. It doesn’t have to be immediate, but good to try in at least 1-2 hours after birth. Can tickle his/her mouth with nipple to get them to open. Remember, as the baby opens his/her mouth to put your nipple in. Baby’s mouth should go around the areola (dark circle around nipple). Baby’s tongue should be on the underpart of the nipple. If it hurts, reposition and try again. Do whatever position is comfortable for both of you and whatever feels normal, there is no one right way. 

Newborn Care

• Advocate for what you have on your birth plan and can remind the doctor beforehand that she wants baby on her chest immediately after birth as long as everything is OK.